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How Do You Talk with Families? (20/22) - Page 49

2/21/2014

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Using positive communication techniques, how would you handle this scenario?
1) Lily is 20 months old. This is the second time she has bitten another child today. Lily’s mom is very upset and may pull her out.  
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27 Comments
Celia McDonald
1/1/2017 12:57:03 am

I would allow the parent to express their concerns and I would tell them I understand that she has to do whats best for her child.

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beth wilson
1/1/2017 06:37:43 pm

I would start by listening to the parents concerns about what's going on then explain and discuss the situation.
I would explain that there are a couple things that could be going on.
The child could be teething.
The child could possibly be sick or in pain.
The child could be getting frustrated due to lack of communication skills.
The child also could be potentially not getting along with a specific child.
There also could be a change in the child routine or maybe something happened at home to disrupt what the kid is used to.

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Sarah Day
1/9/2017 06:57:06 pm

Firstly listen to the parent's concerns and show the mom you understand how she feels. Explain that biting is a very normal behavior at the child's age. Make suggestions as to how you will address the behavior and work with the parent to come up with a plan of action.

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Mikio
1/22/2017 11:20:54 pm

Lily is 20 months old. This is the second time she has bitten another child today. Lily’s mom is very upset and may pull her out.

First, we should listen to the parents and their concerns. Keeping communication friendly and open. Listen and give feedback when appropriate. Ask what the parents solution or offer suggestions to see if we can see a difference in a week or so. Come to a mutual agreement that both sides are happy with. If there is an incident report, pull it out and read over the notes to see if you can find the reason/trigger for the biting.

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Larisa Krutik
3/5/2017 01:29:05 pm

First off I would open communication and develop trust with her mother. Explain to her that this behavior is normal for her childs age. Provide to her with books or handouts, brochures if she asks for my advice or more information. Ask her about anything that might be happening at home that might be brining out her bitting behavior, such as having an older sibling whose plays roughly with or a dog who nibbles or bites. Ultimately i think parents have a say as well if they don't agree with us. But let the parents vent and listen to them attentively we need to remember its their child... and parents know the best about their child.

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Kellie Bauer
5/30/2017 12:10:54 pm

I would first approach Lily's mom with a positive and caring manner. I would talk about Lily's biting and share with her that it is not uncommon at this age. She is learning boundaries. I would allow Mom to express concerns. I would then talk to Mom about things we can do at care and at home to help Lily through this stage.

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Ramona Anderson
6/26/2017 03:56:52 pm

I would listen to Lily's mothers concerns and let her know I understand that it is normal for children to bite at this age. I would ask mom if she is teething. I would ask if she has any suggestions, and then have a discussion with her on a solution of how to handle this at daycare and at home.

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Amanda
7/11/2017 11:11:19 am

I would listen to the mother's perspective. I would repeat back to her what I hear her concerns are. I would reassure her with my interpretation of the situation and that it is developmentally appropriate. I would tell her that we will be observing her daughter to know what might be causing the biting. I would ask the mother to do the same at home and then in a couple days we could both come up with a solution.

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Julie
8/2/2017 07:31:27 pm

I would call a meeting and listen to her concerns. Together we will come up with a solution to keep her child in my care.

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Caridad
8/4/2017 10:08:41 pm

After the parent has had some time to cool off, explain that it is normal social behavior for a 20 month old to use biting as a means of communication. I would want to then ask if they have been experiencing anything like this at home or other places with them. The parent will need to know that although biting is normal, a plan of action needs to be set to help with the behavior. Talk with the parent about different ways we both could help Lily communicate without biting.

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Sally
8/27/2017 04:56:14 pm

I would talk with the parent in a calm steady voice. Explaining to her that the biting her child is doing is quite common at that age, that there are ways to help him learn to control this emotions such as using teething rings. In other words giving the child options, helping him to express his feelings in other ways, and that this too shall pass. I would ask her opinion on what she could try at home to reinforce these changes. Finally I would acknowledge her emotions by saying something like " I see how much you are concerned for your child and the other children in our center, thank you for caring....."

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Sonia Brown
10/4/2017 07:50:21 pm

I would start by asking if something at home has changed, then let her know what happened and give her some reading material that may help her better understand why this could be happening.

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ladan
10/9/2017 11:41:22 pm

I would approach Lily's mom with a positive and caring manner. I would talk about Lily's biting other children and share with her that it is not uncommon at this age. I would allow Mom to share her information about her behavior at home and express concerns. Then I would talk to Mom about some ways we can approach at care and at home to help Lily to understand how to handle and ease her anger.

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Lisa Heisey
10/20/2017 01:24:27 pm

I would listen to the mom, ask if there are any changes at home. Let mom know all the positive things with Lily. And LISTEN more.... work with mom on it

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Erica Hamer
10/28/2017 06:03:46 pm

I would hope that by now I would have a open and trusting relationship with lillys mother. I would listen to the mothers concerns and reflect what she says. I would let her know I understand her concerns and her perspective. I would let her know how much I enjoy having lilly in class and that I would like to work on some solutions together before she pulls her out but that I understand completely if she feels like she needs to make the decision to pull her out. I would also let her know that this is something that is somewhat common and could be because of many reasons and we could work together to help lilly. I would let her know that I am on her team and will support her.

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Courtney
11/1/2017 09:04:50 pm

Explain that biting is a normal behavior at this age. It could be a number of things going on. I do however have a strict biting policy and do not allow it more than 3 times unless they are under 20.

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Pamela Gerke
12/11/2017 01:28:34 pm

I would make sure Lily's mom knows how much we all like Lily and why. I would describe clearly and without judgement exactly what I observed in the biting incidents. Then would ask Lily's mom about how she felt and what she thought about the situation, making sure to let her talk without interrupting. Then I would ask Lily's mom for her ideas about what could be done and what, if anything, they are doing at home about it. I would offer up some child development perspectives about biting behaviors and some possible solutions. I would also clarify any policy our center had about children biting others. I would discuss with Lily's mom until we reached a mutual agreement about how to approach this situation.

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IGNACIA LILIANA VARGAS
12/18/2017 01:26:05 am

The most important and first thing to do is listen to the parents and their concerns. Keeping communication friendly and open. Listen and give feedback when appropriate. Ask what the parents solution or offer suggestions to see if we can see a difference in a week or so. Come to a mutual agreement that both sides are happy with. If there is an incident report, pull it out and read over the notes to see if you can find the reason/trigger for the biting.

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Cami
12/20/2017 10:39:57 pm

At 20 months, the child should understand that biting hurts. As a provider, I would schedule an appointment with the parent to see if there are any changes at the home. From experience there is almost always a shift that happened and the child picked up on it and has no idea how to deal with it. I would sit and listen to the parents to try to figure out how to best help the child.

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lee fielding
12/22/2017 10:51:04 am

Communication with parents is key for me to help parents understand what is going on when their child bites. I have found that just listening to them vent about their frustrations when their child bites at home and at child care and offering solutions will ease the anxiety. This too will pass I always say and I keep a close eye on the child at all times to intervene before the next bite happens. Its very normal I tell them and we just work with the child and families involved and in no time its no longer an issue.

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Leah Lemchen
12/22/2017 02:31:09 pm

I would ask to meet and listen to the mother's concerns and talk about how we can partner for support. We would also talk about typical development, so the mother can know that this is not a sign of big picture aggression, but a lack of ability to communicate clearly.

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Natalya Klochkova
12/26/2017 03:07:46 pm

At first I would listen to parent's concerns.In a positive and friendly way I would talk to parents about things we can do at care and at home to help Lily through this stage.

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ANGEL SANDERS
1/3/2018 12:09:15 pm

In this example I would provide her with a handout about why children bite. And let her no that it is a normal learning experience and how they lack verbal skills and its how they are trying to express themself. I would pair up with the parent and find a solution

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Karin H
1/20/2018 01:43:41 pm

Give parent background information on that particular behavior and how you could remedy it, give several suggestions and come up with a common solution.

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Valerie Patrick
5/19/2018 01:35:05 pm

Allow the parent to express themselves fully before speaking. When the parent is done I would explain to her that the biting is completely normal for a child this age, that the biting is a form of communication because Lily cannot fully express herself. We can help by giving her words to say to the other child to get them to stop doing whatever it is that's bothering her. Tell the parent that pulling Lily out of the childcare will only disrupt the child and not help her to stop biting.

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Jessica
5/21/2018 12:48:43 am

First of would open the discussion with what kinds of interaction has Lilly had with children outside of childcare to get another perspective then I would describe the incident at hand and then if we come to a disagreement work through it and come up with an a tion plan to help Lilly and the children

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Katie Cestnik
6/11/2018 01:04:50 pm

I would discuss child development and how biting is a sign of being frustrated and being unable to express herself any other way. I would brainstorm ideas with mom and how to help the child express their needs/wants in different ways.

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